Straight up now tell me do you really wanna read these forever…oh oh oh! Just kidding, just had to break the ice you know!! And what better way, than with a throw back Paula Abdul smash hit pop single!?
Now it certainly is not a secret that I am very lazy, so this 3 year Camboversary blog-o-Rama is number 1: A couple weeks late and number 2: probably not going to live up to my usual extravaganza style celebration of words and circle people. Can you sense the normality of life in Cambodia slipping in so subtlety that even these blog posts are slowly getting more and more lamo! Don’t worry though, I won’t stop writing them. I gain too much inner peace in the sheer knowledge that I am wasting your time, forcing you to read and read and read! Sorry, that’s terrible….but I am only being honest and I respect honesty! I say, who doesn’t respect honesty!? Ahhh….you sir, well pack your bags, you are no longer welcome here!!
So I have considered reminiscing over the past couple years and sharing deep thoughts of how much my opinion has changed and how my personality has and continues to be shaped to hopefully something better than what I started with. But, meh… Instead I am going to tell you a naked falling story! Thank goodness I am not involved in this anecdote, by the way, or it probably wouldn’t be surfacing here. Anyways, it was Marcie….she had just showered and was wrapped in her towel. Abby and Marcie’s bathroom has a small step to a tiled bedroom floor. Well apparently she had not dried off her feet what so ever and as soon as her foot hit the tile, she was swept away landing flat on her butt!! Abby was in the room sitting on the bed but fortunately had her eyes closed anyways as she was saying a prayer before bed. As Marcie fell her towel of course became more of a sail revealing her true colours! All she screamed was “DON’T LOOK!!!”, followed by an obvious “slap slap BOOM BOOM” sound. Well as I said Abby’s eyes were already closed but she was holding back laughter as she wrapped up her prayer! You can only imagine the laughs that were had and the big bruise on poor bitty baby Marcie’s bottom! Lol and that’s that story…just a plain old naked falling story, but a funny one….haha “DON’T LOOK…slap, slap BOOM BOOM!”
When I started writing this I also considered going into some realities
of the gross things we see…smell…and more so lately what we hear too! Even in the comfort of our own home! ( from outside, not the toilet ya sickos). My angle on those tidbits would have been to gain sheer sympathy….but again. Naaa….I have a different story, short and sweet. A couple weeks ago my good friend Amy and her roomie Mackenzie visited. They are living in Thailand which is where we met. Anyways, Amy came out into the living room one morning, and described to me what would be one of the grossest, completely unexpected happenings of a morning ritual. She said she was brushing her teeth when her toothbrush all of the sudden completely fell apart in her mouth! So yeah, all the individually binded bristles all came apart in a sudsy mouth bath…..barf, how gross would that feel. Anyways, I laughed so hard. I suspect it was a cheap one she picked up from a hotel. That or she could use some funding for her need greating experience..lol just kidding!!
Now I could pull the old “I hate the heat” card but I will spare you. I will spare you because folks, it is time for my annual LIST OF THINGS SARAH LEARNED IN 2015 * props on the stage are shifted, quick wardrobe change and the scene is left with one single light above Sarah as she reads*
1. The more you learn, the more you realize you don’t know! I am talking LIFE, LANGUAGE, CULTURE….you name it. And this is some thing any one of us realizes when they put the effort towards something new or a change of any sort! So stay humble people, but keep learning too, because all the rest of these humble people know how dumb you are!!
2. TREAT YOURSELF!!!! But this goes to people who are pushing for the simplistic life already but not giving themselves a break here and there. All you other splurgers need to CALM DOWN!! Haha just kidding…..naaa, mostly I mean…take care of yourself and now and again….TREAT YOURSELF!! (PS. Yes I love that show)
3. Not that I questioned it years before, but seriously, I can not handle people snorting!!! People are obsessed with SNORTING here….people, this is so nasty. Dear World, please STOP snorting!!!
4. If it tastes like dog food, it probably is dog food. And when I say dog food…..I mean, dog in yo food foo!! Stop eating it, you will not feel well later! ( more of a lesson Abby learned but by example I learned this as well)
5. Stop worrying about it! Everything…..just stop worrying about it! ( this is an ongoing lesson in my life!)
6. Marcie never properly learned the head and shoulders, knees and toes song…….apparently it’s shoulders, elbows head….yeeeeeeah, no that’s very wrong Marcie!!!!
7. We can officially celebrate three years life in Cambodia having not pooped our pants!!! Obviously been some close calls but according to all our friends here, we are reigning champions!!!
8. Abby makes great crepes…..thus a crepe-ist! What!!! Come on it’s funny… Calm down, I don’t make these things up for nothing, it’s my job!
9. Deal with it! There are a lot bigger issues in this universe than the small and the what seems as large problems we deal with individually. Crippling yourself in sorrow is useless, so as I say, deal with it and move on.
10. Last but not least….learned a bit of patience! But I will be honest, there is a slight tiny baby chance I am still working on that one! *wink wink, nudge nudge…..high five, pinch pinch….* we’ll stop there how bout! Haha
Alright, well….that’s it for this round. You are prob finished your coffee now or your slice of sloppy meat loaf. Not sure what you kids eat while reading these days, so feel free to clean up the mess you made of your face while glancing through these make shift photos.
Ps. No extra tips….. My list exhausted my mind of all excess practical wisdom. But I will give a shout out to my buddies Dos and Steph for the awesome title idea!! Thanks guys!